Comentários do leitor

worker money

por Doris Laidler (2019-06-19)


He knew I was a sex worker. It says so, right in my Bumble profile: retired media whore, current actual whore. He had even commented on it, using what every woman longs to listen to from the romantic interest:'Haha, nice ;) '. And yet I watched as his face contorted in to an expression of disgust, his upper lip curling as the reality of my profession came crashing down around him such as a tonne of bricks.

"That is clearly a lot," he explained, and he then rolled on to his back and stared at the ceiling. I didn't hear from him again.

It sometimes surprises people to hear that sex workers do a number of normal people activities, like working other jobs, studying, taking the bins out. We exist in real life after our shifts end and the red light is flicked off; we have dinner with your families and shop at K-Mart and wait on hold with this online sites providers for what feels as though hours.

It's not common that the physical and emotional experiences we've at the office will be enough to replace a potential lack of intimate connection inside our lives beyond work; so most of us also date, with varied degrees of success.

A few months ago, I ended a connection with a person I had been seeing for nearly two years. In private, he was a massive supporter of me working, but around his colleagues and friends his tune did actually change. He'd introduce me, but hesitate in describing our relationship; when he explained, "This is Kate..." the silence that hung in the area where, "...my girlfriend," should have already been weighed a tonne.

I don't believe that he personally had a problem with me being fully a sex worker, but I do genuinely believe that the possibility of others judging me – and then judging him to be with me – was enough to make him want to keep me a secret.

So I've recently downloaded some dating apps and put myself back on the proverbial market, but it's tough. Along with the usual questions one ponders before a date (What do I wear? Where shall we go?) I find myself asking things such as, "At what point do we've the talk?"

The talk by which I clarify my job, re-explain my profession in case my date didn't read my Bumble bio, forgot what it said, or – worse – thought it absolutely was a joke. Do I tell him when we meet, or before we say goodnight? Or do I throw it out randomly over the length of the evening: "Wow, this wine is delicious. By the way, I'm a hooker. Pass the salt?"

The greatest dream scenario is that my date is supportive, and happy that I've found a type of work that I like and שירותי ליווי אשדוד supports me financially. Unfortunately, it has only happened once – once! – so these days, I find that a lot of responses fall somewhere within abject fascination and outright objectification.

Sometimes I end up on the receiving end of a lot of rapid-fire questions ("What's the weirdest thing you've ever done at work? Maybe you have had a celebrity client? Are the people all old and ugly? They're not, like, normal guys like me, are they?") which is preferable to horrified silence, but leaves me feeling like I've just been interviewed for an hour.

Other times, my date can barely contain their disgust, נערת ליווי אשדוד quizzing me over and once more about how precisely frequently I get my sexual health checks done and if I'm sure I'm not a carrier of some mutant strain of gonorrhoea.

"That's all very well and good," one man said, over coffee, "But obviously in the event that you sought out with me, you'd have to obtain a real job. And you couldn't tell anyone we know that you used to work." You ought to probably Google me before you get too attached compared to that idea, I wished to sneer.

Of course, even the crudest type of questioning is just a better case scenario compared to the very real threat of violence that many sex workers face when speaking about their job. I have friends who have been followed home and stalked by men who couldn't realize why their date with a sex worker didn't end with a romp, and others who have had partners show up at their work in a spontaneous fit of jealousy, viciously demanding they empty their locker and return home using them immediately.

And even that is preferable to the possibility of physical violence from a romantic partner. I once proceeded a romantic date with a man who invited me around his bedroom, held me down as he initiated sex with out a condom, and then read among my own, personal articles, about sex work, out loud to me as I lay silently next to him.

Dating isn't easy for anyone. Even the act of experiencing to distil your entire person directly into a short and snappy paragraph fit for a dating app is enough to produce anyone desire to purge their hands and surrender to a life of solitude.

Still, I rely on love, and I know from past experiences that relationships – when they're good – are worth every struggle.

On the occasions when it's all a lot of, I find myself thankful for the simple, stress-free nature of transactional sex. An hour on the clock and a peck on the cheek to express a fond goodbye until next time: only if finding love was as simple.

If you have any kind of inquiries pertaining to where and exactly how to use נערת ליווי אשדוד, you could contact us at our webpage.